Sunday, December 24, 2006

How to ... blog

Here's something for all you silent casual readers of this blog, who missed out on being named TIME magazine's Person of the Year... some tips should you decide to start your own blog.


How to ... blog
by Guy Browning


Traditionally, people kept diaries of their innermost thoughts, safe in the knowledge that no one would ever publish them. Nowadays, millions of people publish their innermost thoughts as internet blogs, safe in the knowledge that no one will ever read them.

Blogging has the same effect on your innermost thoughts as inviting a TV crew into your home. Bloggers think what they want to communicate rather than communicating what they think. Ninety per cent of the people who read your blog live within six miles of your computer. The other 10% read it on your computer. It's never a good idea to blog about your workplace. When you complain about your boss doing nothing at work, you'll soon find the one thing he makes sure he does is read your blog.

Blogs are how teenagers hang around on street corners without leaving their bedroom. It's an ideal place to say everything your parents don't want to hear. "I don't know what to write about today," is not a good way of starting a blog. You'll notice that none of the great works of literature start with that line.

Bloggers' law is that the more time you spend blogging, the less you'll have to write about. Posting bad things on your blog is like dumping rubbish in space. Eventually it will fall to earth and could hurt someone, very possibly you.

Have a name for your blog. If anonymity is important for you, avoid "Ian Smith's Blog". Go for something weary and cynical because this is the default mode for bloggers. Sunny Thoughts For Today will get you precisely no readers because people with sunny thoughts are generally outside playing, not online suppurating.

There's nothing more surprising and enjoyable than getting a comment on your blog. This shows someone is reading what you're writing. They may hate it, but people took time to appreciate Chekhov.

Never meet someone you contacted through a blog. Your disappointment in them will be as nothing compared with their disappointment in you. It's then a rush to see who can blog their disappointment first.

9 comments:

  1. " There's nothing more surprising and enjoyable than getting a comment on your blog. This shows someone is reading what you're writing. They may hate it, but people took time to appreciate Chekhov. "

    I like this part, I do not know if I am Chekhov or the people who take time, I can be both.


    " Never meet someone you contacted through a blog. Your disappointment in them will be as nothing compared with their disappointment in you. It's then a rush to see who can blog their disappointment first."

    Umm, I do not agree with that part, it is too negative.

    ReplyDelete
  2. عندي لك خوش مشروع

    نفتح معهد تدريب مدونات

    نعلم الناس شلون تفتح بلوج و شنو يكتبون و بمنو يطبون و هلم جر

    :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Have a name for your blog."
    .....great tip :-)

    Purgy:
    " getting a cOmment ..."

    yOu fOrgOt tO comment on my last pOst ya Maollana..!:-p

    " meet a blOgger "..!

    I saw sOme blOggers phOtOs...and I thought I lOok nasty..Oh plz..I shOuld send them a thank you emails ;-P ..

    but ..what is blOg..?

    ملحوظة صغيرونة :
    انا حاطة تاريخ محدد لإغلاق مدونتي....
    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Never meet someone you contacted through a blog. Your disappointment in them will be as nothing compared with their disappointment in you. It's then a rush to see who can blog their disappointment first.

    (i have to say,,,,its not always the case...lol.)

    ReplyDelete
  5. zaydoun, I have something for you.

    hint: nokia , parliment, scraming.

    http://xbraines.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  6. dooda

    You are absolutely right. I've met some wonderful people because of this blog, and I hope they enjoyed meeting me as much as I enjoyed meeting them

    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  7. I dont think I've ever been disapointed and I've actually made some good freinds out of blogging. Aside from that, it was a pretty good article and the tip about not talking too much about work is smart. Also the tone of the writer matches the weary/cynical sort of attitude that he says is the default mode for bloggers. Good post, thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  8. وايد عاجبني المقال

    ReplyDelete

Keep it clean, people!